A Change in your Work Life need not be the end of the world!

You have lost your job? You have been promoted or demoted? You have retired? all these can impact who you are but are not the end of your world!

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

So say the words of the children’s rhyme, and in the rhyme Humpty Dumpty could not be put back together again.

What brought this to mind though was how we respond when we take a metaphorical fall, and in particular how we respond to a change in our working lives and whether we can recover from a fall.

Thinking about the latest Premier League managerial casualty, the most recent high-flying business executive who has been fired, the last politician caught out over some misdemeanour and forced to resign, or whenever I hear of a business planning to make another round of redundancies, all make me wonder how these individuals will manage, and come to terms with this change in their life.

We spend so much of our lives at work it often becomes too easy to wrap ourselves up in the role we are doing and forget who we really are. We start to define ourselves by that role, so when we take a tumble, and the role changes, or is taken away from us, sometimes we can find ourselves rudderless, no direction in our lives, and even wondering who we are.

Any change in our working life can cause emotional turmoil, whether it is as a result of losing our job, choosing to take early retirement, or even becoming very successful in a job. Never mind the emotional angst caused when the job is no longer there, sometimes we become the victims of our own success, and reach a point in our careers when we look in the mirror and no longer recognise the person looking back.

I often see clients coming to me, initially to talk about feeling anxious or stressed, perhaps suffering from insomnia, or relying on alcohol or nicotine more, or in some cases withdrawing from friends, family and almost any form of social interaction.

When we start talking, very often these prove to be ‘symptoms’ of a deeper sense of loss, almost an existential challenge of ‘Who am I’? or ‘What is my Purpose in life? and these are the real questions, often as a result of losing a job, being demoted, or promoted,being made redundant or even when we retire.

And returning to my starting point, even after what is for many a very real existential fall, one that is felt very deeply and carries a lot of emotional pain, it is possible to rebuild who you are, to reconnect with the real person inside and find a way forward which is meaningful, although still a challenge.

But with the right counselling support it can be done: how do I know, because I have worked with clients who have worked through this and who have done it, so I have seen both the challenge and successful outcomes in all these scenarios. The outcome was positive in each case, the only difference was how quickly each individual got there.

For more information on how Kaizen Counselling can help you if you are in this position, contact me at kaizencounselling@hotmail.com or call me on 07544 045713.

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